Eyes off his lips

Started with some intense lockdown texting, progressed to an innocent walk in the woods, but I couldn’t keep my eyes off his lips, my hands in my pockets. He came over to my place. Four times, different occasions, we didn’t have sex. Dinner, movies, lips on lips. But no sex. 
It happened, it spoilt it. His brain was so beautiful before. But our rhythm didn’t match. 
I wish I knew, weeks later, what we’d done.
And now, for me? 
Abort mission.