Irresistible

We'd met through a friend once, her smile was to absolutely die for. I followed her on Instagram and she followed me back, she reacted to my story and I asked her to come to a party with me just after the restrictions eased up.

She said yes, we had a fun night. Her charm was just irresistible, the way she looked, the way she smelt had me head over heels.

We kept in touch and met up again after a couple days for an impromptu drink before she left for her hometown to see her family. Sat there talking for hours, with her, I felt at ease, I felt like time just flew by and finally felt that I'd found someone I could be happy with. We could literally could keep going on for ages with no one stopping us, her energy, her vibe was mesmerizing.

I waited all the weeks hoping she'd come back only so I could tell her how I felt about her, little did I know that she'd decided to move to a different city.

Disheartened, I asked her to meet me. We finally decided to take time off our busy schedules and meet, just like the last couple times we kept talking for hours and hours and I felt at peace with her, really wanting to tell her how I felt, but feared rejection.

A few days after this, the feeling of not being able to open up to her was just choking me out and I called her randomly and blurted out all my feelings like an idiot without thinking twice and asked her out to be my girlfriend. She appreciated me doing this and said she needed time to give me an answer.

My fear of being rejected came true, she politely refused as she had feelings for someone else. I was disheartened, yet again.

We agreed to be good friends still and I tried to distract myself and not think about it. We haven't spoken in weeks now and I still wonder what'd happened if she said yes.

Everything happens for a reason, but not being able to talk to her the same way feels strange.

I miss her.