What was that?

Well I have several stories from this time, but I think I will share the one that seems to be weighing the most in my mind. In December 2019, I left a long term emotionally abusive relationship. Fortunately lockdown came at a time where I did not have to deal with him. In May 2020, I decided to give some dating apps a go. I wasn’t looking for anything serious, just flirty, dirty fun. Obviously lockdown prevented face to face fun, so I decided to give sexting a go. Over the summer I was sexting two men and it was enjoyable but I got to a point where I actually wanted to meet someone. In August 2020 I match with a chap on Tinder and Bumble. “Small world,” he messaged. We messaged back and forth, he seemed interesting and when lockdown eased, we met for coffee in September 2020. It was nice and we made plans to meet again, etc. So he carried on messaging but still not another meet. Fast forward to early November 2020. We talked about having an ‘intimate’ bubble. He was keen, I was keen. I went to his house for the first time and we spent 4 hours together just getting to know one another, nothing sexual happened. I went to his house again a week later and were were sexually intimate although it was not full on. We made plans for the next week, but he messaged me at 9pm the day he was supposed to come over to mine and cancelled. December passes and we don’t see each other, although he kept telling me that he wanted to be with me. I get a ‘Happy Christmas’ and I ask him when we are going to create our bubble? He says after December 28th, as he has his children until then. That day passes and I get a
‘Happy New Year’. In the meantime he is still telling me that he wants to have sex with me. This carries on through January, lots of sexy chat and intimate photos. Then it’s the first week of February and he messaged that he is nearby and wanted to know if I wanted to take a walk. I invite him into my place and we chat and it was lovely. I did not initiate anything because I wanted to reassess our chemistry, and it was still there. He messaged me the next day and said he wanted to have sex with me but wanted me to make the first move. I am not sure what that was about. So we message fairly regularly until the end of the week, then I don’t hear from him again until I get a ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’ along with the message of how he looks forward to the next week being intimate with me. Well it never happened. I heard nothing from him the entire week(it was a week he didn’t have his children and he isn’t working). I messaged him and said that clearly his interest in and attraction to me wasn’t big enough. He said he was sorry, and could we chat later? I said there was no point for further chat. I have found all of this confusing and exhausting but I suspect not unusual. I did find myself getting angry and sad. Possible lesson? Not sure.