A change of approach

The last thing I expected was to fall in love in lockdown. Single and living alone, I'd been off the apps for years and had all but sworn off dating. Something about the transactional nature of modern dating didn't appeal to me; I like to meet people, to get to know them and understand them, while forging a connection — I don't work well at high speed. I also hate how quickly people write each other off. Alone at home though, I thought what have I got to lose? No one is going anywhere so maybe they'll be more patient. 

Suddenly in the quiet of lockdown, without all of the noise of the day to day, I was able to see the mistakes I kept on making when it came to searching for a partner, and decided as an experiment to change the things I would value in potential matches. The circumstances also pushed me to be honest with myself and people I was chatting to about what I wanted. I couldn't be bothered to play games anymore — what was the point?

In a couple of weeks it'll be a year since I met the funniest, kindest and most glorious partner I could ever ask for. I don't know how it happened but I am so thankful every day it did. I'm certain without lockdown we'd never have met and though I'd change many things about the past year and the suffering it's produced if I could — it's impossible for me to write the whole thing off when it brought me such warmth and love, too.