Post Dating Hiatus (Over the car bonnet: 3)

18 months of reconnecting to myself post-lockdown, post-break up. Being in my 30s trying to juggle the feelings of wanting to find love and create a family versus only finding relationships that cemented the realisation that being happy on your own is better than being lonely in a relationship.

I moved to London for work. Fell in love with a new team, a new city, new dreams, and myself. And then I fell in love with you. You were only the second date I went on after my dating hiatus. I wasn’t expecting to fall in love with you, I thought at the very least maybe I’d just find a new cocktail bar or a friend in the city. You asked me on our first date which Lord of the Rings character I’d be, and I compared myself to a goblin - you loved it and I realised I’d met someone I could truly be myself with.

It’s been nearly a year, and this love is so peaceful, with all the joyous fun and mischief added in for good measure. It scared me to start with, I’m not used to someone loving me entirely. There are days my insecurities creep in but your reassuring consistency and smile makes them vanish and I’ve finally learnt what it is to be in a secure loving relationship. Thank you. Love from your favourite goblin