All or nothing

Lockdown 2.0 and we both had had enough of trying to find love on this crazy world. I was getting over a bad break up and you wanted sex. You were all or nothing. Making me feel like a million dollars when you had time and then leaving me on read in the next breath. I welcomed this distraction from the heartbreak I was struggling to get over and would happily obsess over it instead of thinking about the one I’d lost. Fast forward five months and I like you. I’ve told you as much, but you say we want different things. You say I want to much. That I am too much. That I need to dial it down a bit. Chill out. The sex is amazing, as a person and a friend he is great. As a man I’m romantically involved with he makes me feel like I’m not good enough, too fat, too loud, too needy. I end up tired from late nights having sex or tired from wondering why I don’t warrant a response to my last text. There is no middle ground with you. But somehow I feel like it’s all my fault that I can’t get it to work. I’m too much. Maybe that’s why they never stay?