Dildo discovery
During lockdown my old flatmate left for Switzerland. Dream, I thought! Flat to myself. But this wasn’t for long. We agreed that the room should be rented to a new sharer as she won’t be back until September.
Right...Advert ON with “social distance” Zoom viewings..
Feels weird, I thought, a stranger in lockdown! But.. I found it! New girl from New Zealand, who seems nice, chill, easy going and very relaxed! Cool, seems like a good match :)
Week one. Maybe a bit too relaxed… 11 pm: the living room door was shut. I could hear my new flatmate having a Zoom call. I really wanted a glass of water from the kitchen and to do that I have to pass through the living room. Right, I thought.. there’s nothing bad about knocking on the door and walking in. “Knock, knock- sorry to disturb!”. I was surprised to find that my new flatmate’s face went a bit awkward .. then I saw a guy on her live chat and her sitting comfy in her sexy pyjamas on the sofa. I thought, oh well... she’s a single lady! Sex chat… feeling lonely, looking for a new adventure during a lockdown! I was very understanding. I quickly got my water and ran back to my bedroom. (Thinking, why does she do this in the living room ?)
The next day: 7am breakfast time. Coffee mug in my hand, I slowly approach my comfy sofa and before I sit down I see it … Clearly … A big, turquoise Dildo fitted tightly inside the cavity of the sofa. OMG... I thought! She’s not just left it there but also totally forgotten about it?! I just hoped that she would see it later, remove it and never ever do it again!
I came back from work…dildo still there.
I wasn’t prepared to deal with my new flatmate in this way, asking her to kindly remove her sex toy! 100 complaints in my head .. praying to God that she will finally see it.
A day later: She moved cushions to cover it up!
Dildo Day 3: I’ve had enough! I’m going to removed it myself ! I hope it is not stuck there permanently and once it is out it will end up on her bed! She has to learn the lesson! And she will be embarrassed forever! Shame on you, I thought. With my bare hands, disgusted face, I approached the green monster and like King Arthur pulling out Excalibur I pull out ...... my dog’s rubber TOY....😳
Yes indeed… the happiness of my dog that I found her old toy was insane. My face was crying out of joy that I hadn’t sent my flatmate an embarrassing message or had a serious conversation with her about it!
On the other hand? She may though the same thing about me!!! That it was my toy and she was covering it up thinking when will I finally notice it???!
We’re still friends.