Hey Google

When I got so drunk I started telling you everything I liked about you. Words came so easy then, and I didn’t have a quick tongue. Or barbed wire, we didn’t play fight. 

I almost said it that night when I said I had a crush.
I almost said it again when we were done for the night and I wrote out the longest message that made it feel like my heart was collapsing in on itself.
Then I woke up, and then it was gone. Erased by sobriety and fear.

What were you going to say that night, when you didn’t finish your sentence.
Why can’t I just get this out?
Even worse, why can’t I just stop feeling this way…(two years now)

Hey google, how do you break your own heart?
Let me know so I can carve it out of me.